Ego Trip

Hey, don’t you think
your place is a little bit
cursed?

The walls warp when
you walk alongside
them and malice wheezes
out from every dark little
corner.

Don’t you think it’s got
something to do
with the fact that every
carpet at your pad
is SmartEmbossed™ with a personalized
ad?

Your feet are creepily
followed by screws twisting
out of the floorboards
even when you pad around softly
on podalic SteamSponge® – each carpet lifts a

little and the dust putters
out of the sides, like
Lazarus sitting upright and coughing;
but these SmartEmbossed™ rugs
are the non-verbal equivalent

of a modern face nailed to
an incredible outfit, and you’ll
develop a dust-allergy one day
that’ll cause you to lose
touch with the ground beneath
your feet.