Tuesday, January 11, 2011


people jump to horrible conclusions when I make Freudian slips
I don’t know –
all I know is that I have an excellent webcam voice
behind me at the end of a receding tunnel is a toupee shrine, hairy and elephantine, rhythmically inhaling and exhaling carpet dust
I am a shark fin with a flawed spray-on tan
a burger with a smiley face fingered into it – dry, polystyrene dough: anciently porous
it’s on days like this that I can sniff out luggage containing Lady Gaga’s E. Coli vibrator
I have prominent knees
my socks are secured to my ankles with toothpicks  
going outside like this may raise influenza risk
a mule asteroid bringing all sorts of new and terrible goodies to Earth
I am sometimes terrorized by my reading glasses sliding off my nose
VEGAS: we are not alone
GENE POOL: leave me the fuck alone
I am on a boat. For realsies.
from here I can see the black, humped, furtive ninja migration:
it’s supposed to be a secret, but with so many, how can they remain hidden?
like a wale’s back diving slowly across the cityscape
the Earth’s crust is supercharged with conspiracy
a large building over there actually just now vomited
corporate emesis
slinking past a pauper assemblage, who themselves are merely ninjas in disguise 
inflammatory Thai massage – the vulgar nudging exploitation of a frog
dry-humping a sports bra until it turns shiny and dings like a tambourine, whose shape it now actually resembles
Hell finally caught up
in order to have reprieve you must train sleep to drill a hole through the back of your head
don’t swim in any Vegas swimming pools
some people’s voices aren’t so good over a webcam 
deceased rhino antimatter
eerie baldness: the mirror a serial killer holds up to us
the electronics of my apartment has just now actually perfected the humidifier’s parabola 


  1. This fucking rocks!

  2. It never goes away. What a person sees, hears, feels and experiences is there for a lifetime. If those brave little people had even a few seconds of what’s in my memory, they would never take part in chat roulette.


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